Lazy Sundays

Sleep in and lazy Sundays are my absolute favorite. It was always something Josh and I enjoyed before E was here, but I love it even more now that E is with us. Josh doesn't have every Sunday off, but we had today together so we made a great day of it. E slept great last night and is finally falling into a pattern. Lately, he has been sleeping from [around] 11 until 3, up/feed/change/snuggle, back down until 6:30. Things around the house went smoothly all morning and we even managed to venture out on a fun adult play date with Josh's brother Zach and his wife Shannon! We decided to check out the renovated bowling alley here in town and throw down for a few frames. Unfortunately they were pretty well booked, so pool it was! I managed to knock a few balls in the pockets, but it was much more enjoyable watching Zach and Josh, who knew what they were doing. The kiddos tagged along (duh..) and were really well behaved! It is so nice to get out and I think E enjoyed it, as much as a three week old can! It was a great few hours. After running a few errands, we came back home and had a great dinner [french toast!] Overall a great day, but pretty uneventful.

OK. So onto something else and just a warning, its a rant. So here goes..Something I never really expected to happen when I had a baby is, what I call, the space invaders. I admit, I am not a huge fan of people in my personal bubble anyways [shocking, I know], but I am an adult and can deal with it. E is like a space invader magnet. I never knew how many people would just walk up and touch him or unzip his car seat cover to see him?? What the??? I mean really?? He is asleep in his car seat in the cart, zipped up, little face cover flipped down and all...so hey creeper, come on over and open his little happy cocoon and aggravate him...no go right ahead, its cool. Better yet, here, just take him on out and snuggle with him, he doesn't know any better so he's real friendly....whatthehellbackoffmybabyyouweirdo!... But, I am an adult, so I just have to smile and make small talk....about the baby who had just went back to sleep and was snuggled in ready to head on home from the store, but is now a crying, fuss-pants because you keep poking him. The doctor doesn't poke him that much, back off. No, I don't want your advice on how to calm him, he was fine until you invaded his space! gaaahhhh! End rant. 


:) 

Running behind.

Definitely the current theme of my life. I feel like I am constantly two, three...OK..ten steps behind. I can't tell you what is going on outside my four little walls. Current events? Pshh, I'll get caught up eventually. Or not. Normally, I would be in a huff not know what is going on out there. But things have changed. A lot is happening in here and it's WAY cooler. Thursday was really average, not much happened. We hung out at mom & dads in the evening. It is really funny to watch E try to figure out who is talking and where all the noise is coming from. He stretches his little neck out and squishes his forehead up trying to see. It is crazy cute. He is perfectly content snuggling with whoever wants to hold him, until he messes his diaper. Then it gets KrAzY, he refuses to be left in a diaper with so much as a piddle, for five seconds. So dramatic! Thankfully, we have all gotten really fast at the unsnapping, lifting, wiping, re-diapering dance.

Friday was much more exciting. Katie met me in town around noon and we had lunch with mom. After lunch we went shopping! Yay shopping! E was great! He just sat there in his giant car seat looking around, trying to figure out where we were. It was so great to get out of the house, walk around and feel like I was getting back into the swing of normalcy. E got some really cute clothes to grow into (which he really didn't need, but OHWELL! These were the first outfits I bought, so not bad) Even Josh got some new wearables. I, however, did not. I have found myself looking at clothes differently. I don't know if it's age or mommy-hood, but I catch myself thinking clothes through. As in, I could wear that to this and that, and it goes with this, and this...etc. I've always loved quality, but before I bought whatever I liked that was quick and easy and worked. So, I am entering a new stage of dressing..? I've always loved fashion and clothes...and shoes...But now I finally feel confident enough to embrace it for myself. No frumpy! I've enjoyed a few weeks of slouchy, dirty hair sans-make up days, but now I am excited when I get up to get dressed, put on make up and do my hair (though a hair cut is needed ASAP). So, even though this blog is mainly about E and his happenings, I'm taking a bit of it, to share inspiration for design, crafting and fashion. Ha, take that little man!

                                                       say what? This is my blog, get your own! 
                        

Wordless Wednesday-loads of pictures :)

Lots of good.

Today was a really nice day, not just because it was sunny and beautiful out but we had a successful day being out and about. Which was good! E had his 2 week check up today at nine. He gained a pound and now weighs in at 8 pounds 12 ounces. Everything is growing and looking good! After his appointment, we stopped into my work for a quick visit. It is so nice to stop by and see everyone, I definitely miss it there. Then we went out to lunch with mom and dad. E did great for his first time out to eat. He hung out in his car seat and managed to stay asleep for nearly the whole meal. GOOD! It wasn't until we were ready to leave that he decided he was too. We took mom back to work and E got to meet her co-workers. We had a quick eat and change before finally heading home around two p.m. Auntie Katie showed up later with yummy stuffed shells and hung out with E while I ran in to town to pick up Josh. It was the first time neither Josh or I were with him. He did great! And by great I mean he slept the whole time. He didn't even know we weren't there. It was nice to have a bit of time to myself today, even if it was just a 15 minute drive into town. It still felt good.

Being at home, for the most part without another adult, really has me itching with creativity. I read a lot of blogs, from DIY to other mommy blogs and I am always amazed by the number of really creative people out there. Not just sorta creative either, like full blown could support a family with their creativity. It really inspires me to do something. Anything and do it well. I meant to run to Michaels craft store today to pick up some supplies, but I will have to do that later this week. I have so many ideas bouncing around in my head, I can't wait to get them out and share them. Somedays I feel like my life is best expressed in charcoal and ink, other days it's words, photos, collages. I had so much fun creating things for his nursery, I look forward to creating more things for to him to enjoy and as he gets older watching him create pictures and stories.

But for now, our day is winding down. This is my favorite part of the day, crawling into bed and hanging out while E is awake in between us. We usually make it a couple hours before he needs a change and eats, then its the tricky task of putting him in his bassinet. Then lights out. Hopefully tonight is equal to today; really good in every little bit.

Lookin' for a sucker...I'm right here. (photo heavy)

I'll admit it. I am a huge sucker for this little fella, a push-over, I'm in over my head with this little guy. And it's already getting a bit ridiculous, I mean he isn't even three weeks old! Last night was another 'please don't set me down, I need a snuggle' night. And I totally justify it by telling myself I'll just hold him for a few minutes and put him down once he's asleep...well, that pretty much never actually happens. I hold him until he snuggles in and settles down, then I wake up an hour (or some nights, a few hours) later because he needs changed or fed. Eventually he ends up in his bassinet for a couple hours, but the night always starts out with him nuzzled into my chest, as I slowly creep from upright to laying down so that I can sleep too. Oh  man, not going so hot. Before he got here, there was a thousand things I told myself I would/wouldn't do as a parent:

• I wouldn't let him sleep in our bed, in between us, that's our bed and OUR space...Yeah right, you can find him there anytime we nap as a family, or after he wakes up at 6 and gets a snack before laying back down for a snuggle before dad goes to work. 
• I wouldn't get frustrated with breastfeeding and pumping (more on this new adventure below!). OK, so sometimes I can do this. Most of the time though, it is frustrating. Some days it hurts, other days I'm tired, occasionally it's perfect. Pumping is just strange. 
• I wouldn't rely on a pacifier. I figured eventually we would use one. I did not figure we would use one on our third day home. It took him a while to get use to it, and he still spits it out most times, but when he's trying to trick me into picking him up and holding him, when all he wants is a bit of comfort, it's a sanity saver. And if he doesn't take to it, then I know he's hungry. Sometimes though he just wants something to do. 
• I would use cloth diapers! Yay cloth diapers. Which we own none of. It was a great idea in theory, and I'd love it if would could actually swing it, but I don't know if it is for us. Josh had a bad run in with cloth diapering and I feel fine about the disposables for now.
• Speaking of diapers: I would be really good about diapers. I wouldn't get grossed out by poo, I'd make sure to get to him before he went cry crazy, I would be fast and he wouldn't pee on me or his things...I gagged over my first pooey diaper, I am slow when it comes to changing, there is pee on everything near his changer and half the time he's in a full blown meltdown during changing. *He literally lost it as I was typing this and mid-change stuck his socked foot in poop.*
• I would sleep when he slept, take care of myself and remember to take it easy. Nope. I wouldn't. Maybe eventually, but not yet.

The list could go on and on. I had a lot of things I intended on doing, only to realize they weren't for me. I have succeeded in a lot of the important ones though: Baby E entered into the world without any drugs and completely naturally. He wasn't given anything we felt was unnecessary at less that 48 hours old. He  has been breastfed since moments after birth and feeds well! His sleeping is pretty good for a less-than-three-weeks old. Over all, I don't think he's suffered because I've dropped the ball. I think you can have great intentions, not follow through and still have a happy babe.

But on another note, pumping milk is WEIRD. I wont go into a lot of detail because I am blushing as I type this, but SERIOUSLY it's odd. The whole thing makes me feel..well..a bit like an animal. It doesn't help that we call the pump 'the milker'. I feel like the whole thing should take place in a sterile room somewhere, not sitting in the living room trying to figure out what the hell I am supposed to do to make this work. It doesn't feel the same, the whole time I cant stop thinking there isn't enough milk in the bottle and then because I'm frustrated less comes out. Ugh. Ick. I feel like a cow. BUT, he had a bottle feeding today that went great (which means at night I don't have to get up every time he needs fed!!).

Last night he had his first bath. Which he l-o-v-e-d, loved it! He cooed and fell asleep in his little bather. And I'm pretty sure it helped him sleep longer on his first stretch. I am really happy he is showing signs of water love, both Josh and I need to be near water for our happiness. We spend a lot of our time hiking along rivers and at the beach in the summer. I can't wait to watch him discover all the gorgeous lakes and bays around us.

                same hands, 34 years apart

weekend re-cap!

What a weekend! We have had a great couple of days spending time with friends and family. Friday after work Josh headed up to Mt. Holiday ski area for a winter-snow bike race. We had a lot of wind (they actually shut down the ski slopes because they couldn't run the chairlift) and the racers had to hold their bikes and be shuttled to the top of the hill on snowmobile. I was really bummed Baby E and I couldn't make it out there to watch. Instead we were huddled up at home until the power went out!! After almost two hours of no power, it was starting to get cold and dark at home, so we called up Auntie Katie and she came and took us to my parents house. Navigating a dark house with a baby and a near dead headlamp is not something I wanted to do! Josh finished first in his race and met us at mom and dads for home-made pizza (YUM!). Little E had a great night Friday, sleeping from 11:30-3 then up for a feed and change then back down from 3:30 until 6:30! It felt so weird to get that much sleep in one night, but all those hours were welcome.

Saturday Josh was off to work and E and I hung out at home, just the two of us. The day went pretty smooth, a few wet outfits, one bad spit up that found its way over my shoulder and down my back and a nice long nap that allowed me to take a well needed bath, over all a good day though. That night we were invited to dinner at our friends house. There were four couples total and seven children! It was quite a night. The kids ranged from 2 weeks to 6 years old and were mostly girls. Three of the little ones were under 5 months. It was so much fun! The older kids were full of sugar from a birthday party that morning. It was so fun to listen to them invent languages and games. The moments filled with laughter far out weighed those filled with tears. The babies were shuffled around into many loving embraces, occasionally a cry would break out and from the next room a daddy or mommy would call out "that one's mine".  It was really nice to sit back and watch the different stages of childhood, we picked up many pointers just watching our friends interact with all the kids. Our little guy slept through most of the night, waking only a few moments to make a diaper mess and eat. For as much as he slept, he had a good night as well. He slept for two or so hours snuggled up with me, then a quick feed and change (during which Josh discovered a now stump free belly button!!) and into the bassinet for four-ish hours.

Today once we were all up and showered (already a successful day!), we ventured into town to run errands  and buy a bouncer chair. Josh assembled the little chair once we got home and Little E loves it!! He just hangs out in it looking around. It is definitely going to help me out because during the day when he is awake, he wants to sit up and face away from who ever is holding him (read: Me). This doesn't really give me any freedom to clean, do laundry, eat, shower, etc...I am SO happy we got one. After settling in for the day, my family came over and so did my friend Katie from work. We had a great day hanging out, watching racing, and eating grilled burgers! Josh took the dogs on a well deserved run through the woods on his bike. E was awake almost the whole time! He got lots and lots of love from everyone and even showed off his bouncer chair skills.  He is currently awake again, after a few hours nap, and hanging out with dad looking at bikes on the ipad:














Hopefully he was awake enough today that tonight will go well! So far he is a pretty neat little guy. I think we will keep him. :)

Spring?

Usually I hate this time of year. I am one of those weirdos who loves winter. I love the crisp air, the clean linen covered hills the warmth of being cozied up at home; I love it! So when thaw time rolls around I usually get pretty bummed out. Snow turns brown and dirty, I start to see the leaves I didn't rake last year, spring yard and house clean up list start formulating in my head...ugh, spring...This year however, I am looking forward to spring. Spring means Baby E's first hikes, walking with the stroller around the 'hood, getting back into a routine and getting back into shape! I am actually excited for spring and what it holds. I can't wait to take him to some of our favorite hiking spots, places that someday he will walk around with his family. Places that hold such special meanings for us, now we get to share with our son. I'm going to be sad to see the snow go (& don't worry, I know we are supposed to get a storm this afternoon, I know spring isn't actually here) but I'm more excited to see the grass green and the trees bud, we've got a lot to teach our little man about the outdoors!


We had an awesome day yesterday! Ran a few errands, which isn't something I would typically be excited about, but a s a new mom its a reason to wash my hair, apply make up and wear real pants. Josh had the day off, so we stayed in bed late with buckaroo then ventured out. Josh's parents brought over dinner and hung out in the evening. Baby E had a better night last night, sleeping for a few hours snuggled up with my sitting up then a long stretch in his bassinet! We even were able to catch a few extra hours between 630 and 8! Yay for sleep!


In other news, could he be any cuter:

*ok maybe I'm a little biased, but really...he's pretty cute ;)

oh my.

Long night last night. Baby E refused to sleep unless he was curled up on me. And I couldn't be laying down while this happened, I had to be propped upright, so we didn't really get much sleep. He managed a few half-one hour spurts and luckily went to sleep for a few hours this morning. I blame Josh for napping with him that way yesterday, he's a smart baby and realized that was way more comfortable than his bassinet. But other than that, yesterday was a great day. We got to hangout as a family and nap and snuggle. Overall, a nice day :)


Last night when I was playing bed, I was thinking about this whole journey. It's no surprise that motherhood is something that is..or was..or still is completely foreign to me. I remember when we found out our nugget was on the way, thinking 'who is going to take care of this baby? I can't I'm busy..' I had no clue how to be pregnant, how to nurture myself in order to nurture this little one inside me. I wasn't ready yet. I had watched friends and family complete the journey in what always seemed like an effortless, beautiful manor, I couldn't possibly do that. I didn't even want to have children as far as I was concerned. I was selfish with my time and the time I spent with Josh. I did not want to share him with someone else (I know that sounds pretty bad, but its honest). But then one day, we met our nephew H. I saw Josh holding him with a HUGE smile on his face. The feeling we both got from seeing this little guy and all the happiness he brought his new family, I knew something had changed. As we left after first meeting him, I asked Josh if he wanted to be a dad. Without hesitation he replied "yes, of course". Well..hmmm..ok, why not. We could figure it out, even if I was bad at it, at least our baby would have one parent that was capable. We could give it a shot eventually. And we did, and now he's here. And I realized something REALLY fast: motherhood is foreign to ALL first time mothers. Even those women who were born to be a mother. Its difficult and no one can explain everything to you. No book is available about every little thing he's going to do, or why he's going to cry, or pee on the wall, or fall asleep while we bathe him. He's his own little person and so far we are all he knows, so who can tell me everything about him? No one, unfortunately. No one else has a baby like my baby. We can glean little things from other families, what has worked, what didn't work, why their baby did this or that. But really, we have to figure this out on our own, to figure out what he needs or wants, just like every other set of first time parents who came before us. This IS motherhood, its weird and foreign and hard and I'm not going to be perfect BUT I'm going to be the best mother Baby E has. I know that much. So here goes Little guy, hang on, because we're going big or going home.

Happy Valentines Day

Somehow, Baby E figured it out last night. I don't know who told him I needed sleep, and a lot of it, but he got the memo. He managed to sleep from midnight to four a.m. Up for a feeding and a changing, then back down until eight! Wow. Sleep, I have missed you. So happy and now he's been awake for three hours, just sitting there trying to make out the dogs and his auntie with his little squinty, strained eyes. I'm not going to let myself think this is a good sign for tonight, but I am going to enjoy the little burst of energy I have today. Maybe even do some laundry?

Or not... :)

Our little guys wasn't even supposed to be here until between Saturday and today. I am glad he made his way into the world early though. As someone who overly enjoys getting/giving presents, I don't think I'd enjoy having a birthday on a holiday. Even though he's to small to know it, he got his first little valentines day card. And he wont be able to enjoy it, but there are cupcakes in the over and lasagna ready to go in. :) It will be a nice date night at home, our first holiday as a family (if you don't count the Superbowl, which we do... :)) Hope you all enjoy your Valentines day!

 ps: heres a little video of our little guy! :)

hi.

So here is my first post. I wasn't going to make a blog, especially not a "baby-mommy-blog" because I was  intimidated by the idea and sure no one wants to read about me/my babe. But after thinking about it, I realized its a great place to share all the things he does without overloading my facebook. And this way my family downstate can follow along with us since we don't see them all that often! So hopefully I'll remember to actually update this with all our adventures and escapades! But first Little E's birth story:

February 2nd. I woke up feeling sorta under the weather, not sick but sore/crampy and not really feeling that great. It had snowed a TON the night before and Josh was getting things around to go snow-kiteboarding after our appointment. We were now on a weekly schedule with our midwife, Peg. After Josh cleaned up the driveway we headed into town, I had to work after our appointment and Josh was headed up to Lake Leelanau for a fun day off. Our appointment went by as usual, nothing new or to be concerned about, all that was left was a quick check to see where the baby was or if anything had changed from the weeks before. Well...we were in labor. Not that I believed it. But we were. I did not know what to do, I couldn't be in labor. Nothing felt different. Labor?!? No, I don't think so..but maybe..So I went to work, because that is what I do to think. I work and luckily my work helps ease my mind. I figured I would work for two hours, then see if I actually was in labor. Peg told Josh not to go out to the lake just in case, and I bumbled about work giggling and being in shock. I'm pretty sure I didn't complete one task, all I could think was labor? no..maybe...definitely not, but I could be. After work we went to the mall, because if we were in labor, we needed a few things. The more we walked around (poor Josh-the whole time he was in snow pants!) the more it was obvious- LABOR was here! We headed back to Peg's for a quick check then went home to sleep. 

February 3rd. At almost exactly midnight, I woke up needing to visit the bathroom, which was a pretty regular trip lately. As I stood up, I felt my water break. Not a huge gush or pop or anything like I had figured it would be, just a gentle bit of water. By the time I came back to bed, I couldn't get myself back in bed. I looked over at Josh and realized I had to wake him up, we were having a baby. Josh got up and helped me labor while tracking the contractions on his phone. We called Peg and continued to labor for a few more minutes. All of a sudden, Josh says 'we need to get going after this next contraction'. I remember looking at him thinking he was crazy. We had only labored at home for less than or just about an hour, we didn't need to head in yet. So here is where is gets crazy...I looked at the contraction tracker: seven minutes apart/5 minutes apart/3 minutes apart...HOLY CRAP, we had to go. We loaded up the car and took off, Josh calling our parents on the way (note: it was one in the morning, but both answered). We arrived at the hospital and they wheeled me into triage, taking their time to put monitors on, ask questions and try to get me in a gown (NOT gonna happen, sorry.) Finally the nurse decides to check me. "OH...you are at ten, you are fully dilated" she says before rushing out of the room. Meanwhile, Josh is parking the car and grabbing our things, and I'm now in a room by myself, wondering WHY I decided a drug free birth was a good idea.. The nurses come back in and wheel me into a birthing room at what felt like THE SLOWEST SPEED POSSIBLE over THE BIGGEST 'little bumps' in the whole hospital. Little bumps, NO they weren't, by the way. We got into our room by 1:50 and with-in 20-30 minutes, I had to push. I was not prepared for the overwhelming need to push now! And Peg wasn't here yet! I was panicking..what was i supposed to do?! So I just pushed. And pushed and pushed. And Peg showed up and I pushed more, on the bed on my side, in the bathroom, on my back, I pushed! Until quarter to 5, when I was done, I gave up. I had no energy left and I couldn't do anything else to help myself. I looked up at Josh, who had held my hands and legs for hours, I couldn't do it anymore. So I snapped at the nice nurse (so sorry), we had to get the baby out. NOW. Nothing was happening and I was DONE. Get Peg, its done, baby is not coming out. Nice nurse left, and brought in Tough nurse. Tough nurse informed me we were going to labor for another 20 minutes. No, we aren't, I'm not doing it. Well....yes I was. She amped me back up and forced me to PUSH! The team started prepping for delivery, when all of a sudden a knock came on the door..Pegs other patient was ready to deliver!! OH NO! I was ready to deliver, what do you mean?!?! But thankfully they pushed their little one right out and peg was back to coach me through the last few contractions. Right as I was starting to get tired out again, Josh says "we can almost see ears!" It was our babys arrival! All of a sudden something changed, there is the head, and a shoulder...then bam! HE'S HERE! What? Who? ITS A BOY?!?!? ARE YOU SURE?!?! 

And he was here. All 7 pounds 12 ounces, 21.5 inches of him, our perfect little boy. 

edited 2.14.2011 to add part of the story back in. Somehow it was deleted by accident.